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Nick vs. Jessica’s Dad, Again

September 15, 2006

Because the then-virginal Jessica Simpson refused to sign a prenup, Nick Lachey is entitled to half of the couple’s assets. Their worth is estimated to be in the $30 million range meaning Nick should score about $15 million. Joe – the omnipresent dictator in Jess's life – apparently offered her husband $1.5 to walk away from the marriage believing the heartbroken lad wouldn't want to brawl it out in court. He was right, but underestimated the former boy band star's ability to add. Nick didn't want to go to court and battle his former wife (and heavy-hitting papa) but rejected the insulting offer. An out-of-court agreement was recently reached where Mr. Newlywed would get more than $1.5 but less than $15. Bet Nick's just glad he won't have to deal with Joe again.

The WB: Brilliant But Cancelled.

At 11:59pm on Sunday, September 17th, the WB will be no more. And so will fall the type of programming we’ve grown to love – serial television in a world populated almost exclusively by gorgeous and troubled characters. Even the old people are sexy on the WB. We’re going to miss it.

The WB began programming in 1995 -- a reaction to the Fox network's growing success. The idea was that smaller networks could thrive in a market where the major networks had become homogenized. While their parents were hooked “Ally McBeal” – a younger demographic was being aggressively charmed by The WB.

The WB found itself in the unique position of building an audience that would stay put. With the launch of it's “Kids WB” programming, The WB began airing shows such as “Tiny Toon Adventures,” wherein child-versions of Bugs Bunny and friends wrought havoc on each other. Also launched was the wildly successful “Animaniacs,” about three oddly shaped cartoon characters who lived in the WB water tower. These shows had the surprising effect that Warner Brothers had popularized with it’s Bugs Bunny cartoons in the 1940s. “Animaniacs” was watched in equal numbers by small children, and stoned college students.

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Fox Copies YouTube, and Fox

September 11, 2006

It's sorta like YouTube.com meets “American Idol.” The new show is called “Your Instant Reality" and it’ll be a chance for viewers to vote on their submitted photos and videos.

Oprah Talks Gay

Her first interview of the new season will be with New Jersey's former governor James McGreevey. The country's first openly gay governor (well, sort of, he came out just as he was leaving office) gives an in-depth interview with the queen of daytime talk. The interview will coincide with McGreevey's book release and hopefully grab some of the gay audience loyal to “The Ellen Show,” which now occupies the same time slot as Oprah.

Wanna Be A Rockstar?

Small screen stars seem to have a passion for the music biz. First there was Adrian Grenier’s band The Honey Brothers and now there's "The Band from TV." The appropriately named group consists of James Denton (“Desperate Housewives”), Hugh Laurie (“House”) and Bob Guiney (“The Bachelor”). It's apparently not cool enough to simply star in a hit show; you also have to be a rocker, too.

Housewives Can’t Keep A Secret

While getting the baby news about Marsha Cross was exciting, it seems most of the big events in season three are out of the bag. Way to go ladies. We know there's going to be a supermarket showdown. We know that while Cross's character is waiting to have sex till marriage, she gets knocked-up (for real) and according to costar Eva Longoria it's written into the show. Longoria also blabbed to a tabloid show that it may not be Bree's husband Orson (Kyle MacLachlan) who is actually the one to impregnate her. If the past is any indicator we can also expect approximately one person per show will be killed off. Or maybe they are telling us a bunch of lies to throw us off. Let’s hope so.

A Borghese Bachelor

Seriously! This guy shouldn't need any help finding a bride, but he’s signed up to be the next “Bachelor” anyway. He, Lorenzo, is a member of the famously wealthy and powerful Italian Borghese family, and cute. Very cute. When season 150 of the "Bachelor" premieres October 2 look out. This Italian stud -- although Lorenzo mostly resides in New York -- made a couple noble (oh yeah did I mention he's an actual prince) requests when agreeing to participate in the show. No models, he said he wanted real women. He also wanted at least two Italian women as contestants, which pissed the hell out of the American contestants, we’re sure.

Fox Shows Off Standards

A theme on Fox's new “Standoff” (Tuesdays at 9 pm) is that the FBI doesn't allow dating among agents. When Ron Livingston and Rosemarie Dewitt's relationship is made public, the two are forced to call it off (or take it back underground). In real life the Bureau doesn't give a crap if you date another agent. Funny when life is moremorally lax than a Fox show.

Jessica's "Relationship" Ends In Tears

Former “Newlyweds” star Jessica Simpson took a bold stance against rumors she was "in love" with singer John Mayer by firing her publicist. Ok, maybe she didn't actually do the firing, the muscle behind the business did: Daddy. In any case, the romantic rumors may have quashed any chance of a real relationship between the two. While her camp was leaking tidbits to all the rags, his camp was disgusted by her overt strategy regarding matters of the heart. Mayer wasn't interested in playing boyfriend to help her sell albums.

Late Night With A Gangster

Come on, seriously, the last thing anyone wants to hear before going to sleep at night is NOT “The Soprano's” Bobby "Bacala" Baccalieri. But HBO is flirting with giving Steve Schirripa, the actor behind the belly, a late night gig. Apparently he has a unique voice and opinions. Who cares? He doesn’t seem very funny, nor pleasing to look at. He's perfect for the “Sopranos” but let's not push his range. This deal must have involved some backroom muscling.